Help from Extreme pain and trauma of abandonment, rejection, and betrayal
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Prayed for 1 time.
I Prayed For This
Please Lord help me from the extreme pain of being abandoned by a man I thought was your will to marry. I prayed the whole 7 1/2 years and stood by him 6 years through the end of his 25 year Incarceration. I had did this because i believed even if a relationship didnt work that I would have a True friend for life which he told me he would always be my friend and stand by me, and he was my best friend, but now he isnt even a friend. I have many health problems that he knew about and I am now alone in a big house that I prayed you would never let me get if it wasnt your will. I prayed all along and live now in His state and feel so alone that the only reason i go own on is because of my son. My only hope is You Lord, because I trusted someone to be there for me the way i was there for him and instead He is helping another woman. I was abandoned by my parents and very wounded by a spirit of rejection my whole life. Somehow i believed God brought us together after knowing each other as kids and me feeling something special so i eventually trusted this man. Now the loneliness and rejection, and emotional, financial and even physical abuse when ive spoken up has broken my spirit and I dont know how I can continue without a miracle of emotional healing From the Lord Jesus. Im so tired and physically sick already and cannot handle all the financial and the physical aspects of maintaining a home. I have no family here and cant afford to move back to my hometown. He has turned from God also and i pray he Holy Spirit would convict him and bring him to true repentance and save his soul. Let no evil and illegal things prosper and bring divine justice for me because I didnt deserve such betrayal and abandonment. I gave money to feed him when he had no food and visit him when no one else did. Now i am without food and at risk of having my utilities shut off which he had a hand in running up and He chooses to not even give me any money when he at least helped before, and this isnt even my bill. He also damaged my house with promises of fixing it later but has shown that he cares nothing that happens to me. I am trying to hold on that the Lord cares about me and even though I have no family here and my trusted friends all live in another state, that God will make a way. It is Not about this rejection alone. It is all about the rejection of a lifetime starting with my parents giving me up, and my ex husband and now at this stage of my life I dont have anymore strength, support or love next to me. I made a big mistake trusting someone who turned their back on me and he made it even worse by being there for someone else who i guess in his eyes can do more physically for him than me. My prayer request is that i be healed from this wound that is bleeding everyday because the hurt is so deep I dont care anymore about my life which is sad because at one time I had peace. I have also pray that my anger and resentment and bitterness of what happen to me would go. I know in my heart he is a wounded and broken soul as well and been praying for him also because i didnt realize how prison had changed him. In my heart and soul i made a commitment to him and was faithful believing that i would be his wife when he even put a ring on my finger and I had every intention of standing by him no matter what. I prayed and believed God that if it wasnt meant to be that He would open the doors so i could go back home and No matter how hard i tried to go to where i had a few trusted christian friends that are like family' No door is open and I cant afford it. So i feel my soul is ripped out and I need Jesus Christ to bind up my wounds and love me because no one can help me but Him. I been crying every day and guess i need to accept that the very abandonment that i went through my whole life is a spirit of rejection that the enemy has used to try to destroy me my whole life. Trying to hold on to him as a friend has only caused more pain. Please I ask for a miracle that God would forgive me for my part in giving my heart and soul to a human being instead of only to the Lord. I dont feel I can trust Anyone' except Jesus so i ask that He would come and make a way for me and provide for all my needs as it says in the Bible that He is our provider and source. I ask that He would come and relieve me of all this pain and even bring christian positive friends in my life. I ask for Hope where i have none. I ask for wisdom that He protect me from anyone looking to take advantage of me when I am so vulnerable. I think of the betrayal Jesus went to on the way to the cross so i know he knows the pain I am going through. Help me please Lord to find you. I thank you in advance and I pray in Jesus Holy name. Amen
Donna
Received: September 21, 2017